8:17 am
"muntikan na din ako mag-quit." ("i was at the brink of quitting.")
that was what i said to a co-first year resident of mine who was contemplating on quitting the residency training program.
radiology is an interesting field. each x-ray film present a different story, a different case. no two radiographs, not even those of the same person, is the same. it's a field where you need to rely on your theoretical knowledge, experience, and skill so as to make an accurate interpretation. it's not physically demanding as surgery, or internal medicine, but it is as if not more mentally demanding as the rest of the specialties in medicine.
we are now 4 months into our training. even if it's not as physically taxing, we do get tired. and boy, are we tired. tired of sitting all day, staring at x-ray films and deciding if that little speck of white is pathologic or not. tired of reading pages and pages of our books and taking one exam after the other. most of all, tired of hearing crap from this one consultant.
a few days ago while i and that co-first year were on duty, she had to facilitate a t-tube cholangiogram. the attending surgeon of the patient was the one who was to inject the dye, and she was to position the x-ray tube and take shots of the study. when she was through, she was supposed to show it to the consultant. but the surgeon insisted that she not leave because he wanted to perform another study. this went on longer than expected, and she was not able to show both to a consultant. the following day, she showed the films to this consultant. she wasn't able to explain her side because this consultant kept firing off her mouth. it was ok if she only got angry and pointed out her mistakes, but it's another thing to insult my co-first year's character. not going into details on that. we were all experiencing the lows of residency at that time, and that incident added to our "depression". that's why my co-resident almost didn't report back in the following day.
our chief resident talked to us, me and my co-resident. he said that we shouldn't mind that consultant. it's her character. he then told us the story of how he was also shouted at and insulted by that consultant. yet, here there he was, on his last year of training. he said that we shouldn't throw away our careers just because of that one person. it's not a valid excuse.
so here's to the four of us first year residents holding on. we vowed to see this through and finish our training.
of course, we're also hoping that this consultant quit her position too. haha!